Addiction and Divorce
In This Article
Substance Addiction and Divorce
Substance abuse and addiction are linked to higher divorce rates. Approximately 40 to 50 percent of married couples in the United States divorce.7
The divorce rate for subsequent marriages is even higher.
Substance abuse and substance use disorders (SUD) can lead to serious negative consequences in one’s life. Despite this, addiction negatively impacts the individual’s family as well. This is why divorce rates are much higher among those addicted to substances.
Once a person is addicted to a substance, it becomes the highest priority over everything else.
As a result, someone may begin to neglect relationships, including with their:
Online Therapy Can Help
Over 3 million people use BetterHelp. Their services are:
- Professional and effective
- Affordable and convenient
- Personalized and discreet
- Easy to start
Answer a few questions to get started
Signs of Substance Abuse Damage in a Relationship
The following are common symptoms of substance abuse:
- Extreme mood swings
- Emotional stress
- Spending excessive amounts of money on drugs
All of these factors can lead to divorce.
Other reasons why substance abuse and addiction are responsible for many divorces include:
- Financial Troubles — some people struggling with substance abuse or addiction spend 50 percent or more of their income on drugs. In marriages, this can cause trust issues and financial problems. This can ultimately lead to divorce. Additionally, some individuals spend up to $1,200 a day on drugs.
- Domestic Abuse — drinking alcohol excessively and using tobacco products and/or narcotic drugs are associated with domestic violence. Rates of domestic violence are significantly higher in those who abuse substances than those who do not.
Addiction and Divorce Settlements — How Do They Relate?
If you have filed or are about to file for divorce due to your spouse’s addiction, there are a few ways substance abuse can impact the divorce process.
These all depend on:
- Your unique situation
- What state you live in
- Whether you have children or not
Child Custody and Court Proceedings
If you have children with your current spouse, custody will be an important factor in the divorce process.
If they have a current issue with drugs and/or alcohol, it is more likely that the parent who does not misuse substances will get full custody of the children.
However, if both parents only drink in moderation and do not use drugs, it is much more difficult for one parent to get custody over the other.
Two other factors to keep in mind about child custody include:
- If your spouse attended addiction treatment in the past and is working towards recovery, the court may allow supervised visitation and overnight stays. They will also randomly screen the parent with alcohol and drug tests to ensure they are staying sober.
- If there is proof that your spouse’s addiction puts your child’s safety at risk, full custody may be granted to the parent who does not abuse substances. This means they also have no visitation rights. This occurs in extreme cases.
If a spouse spent a lot of money on substances during a marriage, alimony might be awarded to the sober spouse.
Alimony is a legal obligation that states a spouse must provide financial support to the other after the marital separation is official.
Many U.S. states reimburse the sober individual for any finances lost to their spouse’s addiction.
Divorce procedures and rules vary from state to state.
However, in many U.S. states, people can file for divorce with their spouse’s addiction being the primary reason for the separation.
Abuse vs. Addiction
Substance abuse and substance addiction, also called substance use disorder (SUD), are two separate terms.
However, in many cases, abuse and addiction are connected.
For example, someone who abuses substances may be at a higher risk for addiction. This depends on which substance they are misusing and for how long.
Addicted people also experience severe withdrawal symptoms after stopping use. Those who abuse drugs do not.
Substance misuse is defined as a pattern of harmful use of any substance for mood-altering purposes.
On the other hand, SUD is a diagnosable disorder that results in physical and psychological dependence.
Someone who abuses drugs is typically able to quit. But this is not the case for everyone.
Depending on the drug’s addictive potential, substance abuse can lead to addiction.
The most commonly abused substances among adults that can lead to addiction include:8
- Opioids and pain relievers
- Central nervous system (CNS) depressants
Seeking Treatment For Addiction
If you suspect your spouse may be abusing drugs or secretly misusing drugs, it is essential to speak with them about your concerns before the situation escalates.
Setting up an intervention with family members and close friends may also be beneficial.
Organized interventions help you address the problems in a safe, private environment. You also receive help from an addiction professional or counselor.
If your spouse is already addicted or diagnosed with a substance use disorder (SUD), it is crucial to seek professional medical treatment.
This is especially true if their SUD is affecting your:
If your safety is at risk due to your spouse’s addiction, there are resources available. For example, the National Domestic Violence Hotline.
If you are thinking about divorce, it might be effective to ask your spouse if they can give addiction treatment a chance.
If they agree, you may be able to save your marriage and work through the issues.
Common treatment options recommended for substance use disorders (SUD) include:
- Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) or Narcotics Anonymous (NA)
- SMART Recovery
- Detoxification and professionally monitored withdrawal
- Inpatient or outpatient treatment
- Medicine assisted therapy
- Behavioral therapies, such as cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT)
- Individual, family, and/or group therapies
- Aftercare and supervision to ensure they stay sober after treatment
Call to find out how much your insurance will cover
- Bhatt, R V. “Domestic Violence and Substance Abuse.” International Journal of Gynaecology and Obstetrics: the Official Organ of the International Federation of Gynaecology and Obstetrics, U.S. National Library of Medicine, Dec. 1998
- National Institute on Drug Abuse. “The Science of Drug Use and Addiction: The Basics.” NIDA
- “How a Spouse's Substance Abuse May Change Your Divorce Strategy.” Lawyers.
- “Risk and Protective Factors|Intimate Partner Violence|Violence Prevention|Injury Center|CDC.” Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, 8 Oct. 2019
- Collins, Rebecca L et al. “The role of substance use in young adult divorce.” Addiction (Abingdon, England) vol. 102,5 : 786-94
- Edwards, Alexis C et al. “Associations Between Divorce and Onset of Drug Abuse in a Swedish National Sample.” American journal of epidemiology vol. 187,5 : 1010-1018
- Marriage & divorce, The American Psychological Association (APA)
- NIDA. "Most Commonly Used Addictive Drugs." National Institute on Drug Abuse, 25 Jun. 2020