Reader Question: My Boyfriend Is An Addict

From Our Readers: My boyfriend is addicted to drugs. How can I help him?

Watching someone you love struggle with addiction is incredibly tough⁠—but it’s not completely hopeless.

Here's what you can do to help your boyfriend:

• Learn about addiction: The more you understand how drugs affect the brain, the better you can support him.
• Talk it out: Have a calm, honest conversation about his addiction and how it's hurting you both. "I feel scared when you use drugs" is better than blaming him.
• Encourage professional help: Treatment like therapy or rehab can make a big difference. If he's open to it, offer to find options or go to appointments with him.
• Set boundaries: This protects you. It could mean no drugs in your home, not lending him money, or not putting up with him when he's high.
• Don't enable him: Avoid making excuses for his behavior or fixing problems he creates because of drugs.
• Take care of yourself: Support groups or therapy for partners of addicts can help you cope and stay strong.

Remember that recovery takes time. There might be setbacks, but be patient, keep offering support, and remember your boundaries.

You can't force him to get better, but your love and support can make a difference. If you feel unsafe or can't handle it alone, I strongly advise reaching out for help. Your well-being matters too.

What are some resources to help with addiction recovery?

When it comes to addiction recovery, help is always within reach. Here's how to find the right support for you or your loved one:

• Partnership to End Addiction: This organization aims to address addiction on a national scale by mobilizing families, policymakers, researchers, and healthcare professionals.
• Narcotics Anonymous: A global, community-based organization offering a 12-step program and regular group meetings.
• National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism (NIAAA): Provides leadership in reducing alcohol-related problems and offers extensive resources on alcohol-related topics.
• Substance Abuse Treatment Facility Locator (SAMHSA): Helps people find treatment facilities near them.
• The National Institute on Drug Abuse (NIDA): Conducts and supports research on all aspects of drug abuse and addiction.
• National Institute of Mental Health (NIMH): Focuses on understanding and treating mental illnesses, including addiction.
• Alcoholics Anonymous (AA): Offers support and fellowship through group therapy and Twelve Steps programs.
• Al-Anon and Alateen Family Groups: Provide support for relatives and friends of individuals with alcohol problems.
• SAMHSA's National Helpline: 1-800-662-HELP (4357), a free, 24/7 confidential service providing referrals and information.
• Self-help groups: In addition to AA, there are alternatives like Rational Recovery and Women for Sobriety for those who may not resonate with AA's approach.
• Family support: Resources for families of addicts, including guides for parents, spouses, children, and siblings of those struggling with addiction.

Addiction recovery is a personal journey, and what works best can vary from person to person. It's often beneficial to explore multiple resources and approaches to find the most effective support system for your specific situation.

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